Since Finley turned two, its been like a red rag to a bull for people asking if we’re going to have another baby yet.

‘Must be time for another don’t you think?’

Seriously, is two years like the magic number or something? Is that a deadline I didn’t know about? Am I falling behind on some baby schedule production line?

‘So whens the next one?’

Woah, back up there nosey Nelly. That’s a bit personal don’t you think?
Thing is, I find people asking me that question quite rude. I mean for me, that’s private. I wouldn’t dream of asking someone I didn’t know very well if they were planning on getting up the duff anytime soon.
Just because someone had a kid this one time, it doesn’t mean they want to do it again. In fact it doesn’t even mean they can do it again. What if one is just enough? What if they can’t afford another child? What if they aren’t able to have another?
Maybe they’re not ready to think about it yet, maybe they’ve just started to catch their breath and would like to enjoy this time as a three piece without you poking your nose in and asking awkward personal questions. Or maybe, just maybe its none of your business.

‘It will be sad if he doesn’t have anyone to play with’

He does have people to play with actually. He has a whole host of adults and children in his life, falling over themselves to play with him. He doesn’t sit in a corner all day, sad and alone just because he doesn’t have a brother or sister.

‘Well, you don’t want him to be an only child, do you?’

Don’t I? Maybe I don’t, I don’t know? Do I have to decide right now? Here? Today, in your living room? And what’s wrong with only children anyway? Can you spot them in a crowd? Do they grow horns? Are they statistically more likely to be serial killers?

‘You know, the clock is ticking’

Ok no-one has actually dared say this to my face but you can tell that this is on their mind. Well rest assured lovey, its on my mind too, I am 30 next year. I am aware of this, I can manage simple math.
Still, it doesn’t mean I’m about to panic buy another baby, like some Boxing Day lunatic in Curry’s. Thank you very much.

So how about a question for you Baby Police

‘Why don’t you just back off and mind your own bees wax?’

We’re Being Questioned by the Baby Police

28 thoughts on “We’re Being Questioned by the Baby Police

  • September 11, 2015 at 10:02 am
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    Oh don't – it doens't matter how many children you have, you still get the nosy nellies ! I have four and I get … “is that it now?” grrrr #effitfriday

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  • September 11, 2015 at 10:05 am
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    haha – I could have written this myself. A friend asked me this two days after Jack was born – are they for real?! When you are ready, you may CONSIDER another but until then, as you say, mind your own xx #PicknMix

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  • September 11, 2015 at 10:49 am
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    I never stops. I have two and I still get asked “when's the next one then” and when I say, “no that's it, I'm done” the usual response is “yeah right, that's what they all say”. Can't win! #effitfriday

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  • September 11, 2015 at 12:33 pm
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    People are so rude! Why is it ok to ask personal questions about your reproductive choices! Grrr! We are trying for no 3 but I'm 39 so I get the “you are a bit old aren't too?” 😳 popped over from #effitfriday

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  • September 11, 2015 at 1:28 pm
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    My boys are five years apart and in that whole five years, my ex and I got asked constantly when were we going to have another. Even now, that I'm not with anyone and I'm nearing 40, I still get asked, “So, are you planning on trying for a girl anytime soon?” Really? I have two awesome boys and I love them more than life itself. I don't need a girl in order to feel complete. It's like telling me I need a man. Damn people back off! Great post! Thanks for sharing! Visiting from #effitfriday

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  • September 11, 2015 at 1:39 pm
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    Haha. I had mine so close together in age (accidentally) no one got chance to ask! & I don't really get it now, actually (possibly because I have two children so young & so close together in age that anyone would consider it insanity if I was currently planning another!) And do only children not have horns, then? 😉 #picknmix

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  • September 11, 2015 at 1:56 pm
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    I have a 16 yr old step daughter and was 36 when we had my mini. I decided pretty quickly that this would do it for us. There are times I wonder if I made the right decision, but it was mine to make. Everybody else can screw off

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  • September 11, 2015 at 5:53 pm
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    This is so true! It also happens the moment you say “I do”. I actually had someone ask when we were starting a family at our wedding reception! I swore there & then that I would NEVER ask anyone. And I never have! #effitfriday

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  • September 11, 2015 at 7:34 pm
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    This made me laugh as we were asked this so much #picknmix

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  • September 12, 2015 at 7:46 am
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    Ba ha ha ha ha. Clock ticking? Mrs Adams and I didn't have our first until she was 38!

    I hate this line of questioning too. It assumes an awful lot and you might as well ask what contraception a couple are using! The reason I really dislike it is that the couple, as you rightly point out, may have fertility issues or some other reason not to have more than one. Good post. #effitfriday

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  • September 12, 2015 at 11:58 am
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    Some people just don't think before they speak. When I got pregnant with baby no 3 and announced it most people were really happy. However some people gave me comments like “really” and “was it planned” also “lets hope its a girl”! #picknmix

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  • September 12, 2015 at 12:44 pm
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    I lost count of the amount off times we were asked this question but people soon stopped. Just as well because our first came along eight years after tying the knot!

    This reminds me of what my Nan said to me when I got married.

    “You realise, people are going to ask you 'when are you having kids?' They asked me that when I got married. Then, years later, somebody asked me 'when are you going to stop?'

    She had a total of eight in all.

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  • September 13, 2015 at 11:33 am
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    I don't know why people feel the need to ask – its such a personal question and I have been guilty of it myself. We were asked soon after we got married, then not long after my eldest was born we were asked if he would be having a brother or sister! My youngest is now 2 and a half and we have been questioned on baby number 3 and if we are going to “risk” trying for a girl!!!! Drives me mad sometimes! #BrilliantBlogPosts

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  • September 17, 2015 at 7:57 pm
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    I remember this well and now with three I have people looking at me usually with a wink saying “anymore then?” Thanks for linking to #PicknMix

    Reply
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